The year is 1952. A crack team of scientists have learned how to destroy boredom in all its forms. They call their invention, “theCHIVE App.” But, fearing its power to distract millions with pictures of hot girls and hilarious memes, and the fact that nobody has a smartphone or even knows what that is, they lock it up in a deep underground bunker, never to be enjoyed again.
But after like… an earthquake in like… I don’t know 2014 or something, theCHIVE App is unleashed upon an unsuspecting world. Funny memes. Even funnier videos. GIFs and photos of sexy ladies. Heartwarming stuff. The latest trends in entertainment and lifestyle news. It all comes pouring out. Boredom runs to the far corners of the earth. But oh no my friend it cannot hide. theCHIVE App is probably the best app in the world. It will not rest until even the worst work-related boredom perishes!
So, why download us? Because…
* We statistically make post-lunch poops 47.6% more enjoyable.
* We’re mostly original content.
* We’ll also show you whatever else our crew thinks is cool.
* We’ll send you notifications (if you want) of trending Internet news, so you’ll be clearly better than your dumb friends.
* We said, “Sexy ladies.”
* Do you really need anything else?
